Would you visit the Adult Baby spa?
Exploring the basics of the ABDL community
Well hello horny readers! The results from last week’s poll are in: 89% of you said that you were not satisfied with the sex ed you had in school. 64% of you agree that the sex ed you grew up with left you with beliefs you had to correct when you were older.
Thank you so, so much for reading the ADULT SEX ED newsletter! If you’re enjoying it, please share with friends, so they can be hilariously informed.
Adult Sex Ed comedically challenges why we think what we think about sex. In case you’re new, I’m Dani Faith Leonard, a comedy writer, film producer, and performer. In 2018, I started a comedy show called Adult Sex Ed and launched this newsletter last year. Each week, I take a fun deep dive into a topic that I’ve been researching. Want to know more? Read the whole description on substack here.
Ready to get a little smarter? Okay, let’s go!
Happy Valentine’s Day! You probably have plans already (or perhaps you’re out for the night, depending on your time zone). Maybe you’re indulging in dinner and drinks? Then, you can stop off at the spa to indulge in some stretching, guided meditation, makeovers, and even piggy paint! You can bring your favorite blankie, stuffie, onesie, or even your favorite diapers! Wait…what?
A story came out last week that shocked New Englanders and the Fox News set alike. The Diaper Spa, which caters to the ABDL community, opened in New Hampshire and people are big mad about it. The spa is physician-owned and, according to its website, all patients are screened, but many are focused on the spa’s location in a residential area near parks where kids play. Now, officials in Atkinson, NH have scheduled a public hearing for today — Valentine’s Day — for a business application from the owner. It seems like “live free or die” shouldn’t be your state motto if you don’t want to attract some different folks. Some people in the ABDL community are also upset about the location, which was bound to get bad press, as well as the exorbitant cost. Others had no idea that Adult Babies were even a thing!
The ABDL community is made up of adult babies, mommies, daddies, diaper lovers, littles and more. ABDL, sometimes written as AB/DL, stands for Adult Baby/Diaper Lover. The community is as diverse as any other, with some using age regression and/or diapers as a kink, some as a non-sexual healing practice of sorts, and others as a whole lifestyle. The community has two distinct sections that sometimes overlap. Adult Babies are into age regression, usually referred to as “age play.” For Diaper Lovers, the diaper can be, like other accessories, a fetish object in its own right without the age play. However, there is also a ton of overlap in the community, with many littles wearing diapers as well. In case you’re wondering, the diaper can be used in different ways—it can be a variation on water-sports. For some, the changing experience is a chance to be intimate.
The visibility of the community has increased in recent years, with the emergence of really accepting online spaces. There are many subreddits, including ones where people can trade pics of very full diapers (click on the link at your own risk). Before you say that there must only be a few people out there with a diaper fetish, you should know that there is a whole industry that caters to the community! Companies like ABUniverse, which happens to have a 100% ABDL team, cater exclusively to adults who want that extra crinkly sound in their pants. A recent review on Crinklz brand diapers reads, “Love the fit and they look so cute on my hubby and they hold a lot.”
In comment sections on the internet, people are really freaked out by this particular fetish, so let’s dig in deeper. The rarely-used scientific term for an adult baby fetish (sexual or non-sexual) is paraphilic infantilism, also known as autonepiophilia. As I wrote last year, many people forget that there’s actually a distinction between kink and fetish:
A kink is a sexually unconventional practice, fantasy, or concept that you use by yourself or with a partner. What’s considered kinky is subjective; the word kink is derived from the idea of a “bend” in your sexuality and some people bend more than others.
The main distinction that many professionals make between a kink and a fetish is that a fetish is something that has to be present in order for someone to get off. A fetish is not considered to be a disorder, unless it causes a lot of distress (or like, you have to commit crimes to do it).
So is it possible that you might have a slight age play kink without knowing it? How many people use baby-talk and call their lover daddy? While at the more extreme end of the spectrum, ABs wear diapers and onesies, drink from a bottle, and suck on a pacifier, on the other end of the spectrum is baby-talk or BDSM power dynamics involving punishment.
Happy Valentine’s Day. See you at the spa. No, the other spa.
Here are some other newsletters you might like:
You can access all past newsletters here!